I remember the song about running through the wet grass.
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Better Than Ezra - Greatest Hits
Topic: Feelings
So I was strolling through BullMoose today and I caught it out of the corner of my eye. Better Than Ezra's Greatest Hits CD. God, I loved listening to them back in the day on CYY. I had to get it. I used to sit and just lose myself into the song "Desperately Wanting". There's just something about it that makes me feel all introspective.

So, now that I'm feeling all introspective...

I think my disconnection from the whole world the past few months has been from my total downfall into the pit of loneliness. I have been desperately seeking some sort of companionship and it's making me isolate myself even more. What an idiot! Well, I'm trying to make nice and get to know some new people and reconnect with old friends. Maybe along the way I'll find somebody, be it a love interest or just friend, that can keep me company and I wont feel so crappy anymore.

If I can manage to keep this website up to date then maybe I wouldn't lose touch with so many people too. LOL.

Burning Desire!!!
Mood:  special
Now Playing: Coheed and Cambria - Second Stage Turbine Blade
Topic: Feelings
Man, I'm feeling insanely creative. I just don't know how to get it all out. Working on the webpage has definitely helped but I feel like I need to do so much more.

Why am I always so lazy though. I really need to get on the ball and get working on something. Anything that's productive and anything that's creative. I'm going stir crazy in my own brain and it's killing me. Argh.

I need to feel like a winner. I'm not feeling bad, really. Just need to feel like things are going right for me.

Well, I'm gonna cut this one short before my brain explodes.

Warm and Fuzzy
Mood:  flirty
Now Playing: Coheed and Cambria (still)
Topic: Feelings
The more I talk to him the more I fall for this guy. Jonathan is making me feel very warm on the inside. I feel so comfortable talking to him. I'm gonna stop sulking about "not having any luck" cause meeting him was definitely something good for me. I'm very interested in seeing where this can go and I hope it goes well.

I printed off a picture of him to show Stephanie at work and it's ended up sitting at my station. I look at it during the day and his eyes make me smile. Really has helped me the past few days to get through the work day.

I'm starting to sound like a giddy school girl so I guess it's time to call it an end for this days entry. I'll probably be spouting off about Jonathan again real soon.

Ahh, the weekend
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Coheed and Cambria
Topic: Feelings
So, I talked to Steve tonight. It was a great conversation. I've missed him. He's actually got a new boyfriend named Jamie. I'm happy for him too. I'm glad that things went the way they did between us but it still feels kind of weird in a way. I guess because I'm looking for love too. Steve made me feel great and I have a whole lot of love in my heart for him but where's that guy that I can hold and call mine for the rest of my life?

Jonathan definitely has all the qualities I'm looking for in a guy but he's going to be moving back to DC in a few months.

Maybe I am feeling lonely. I don't know. Am I getting old and ready to settle down? If I am, where's the right guy? I guess I just need somebody nice to cuddle with. I need to feel warm on the inside. Steve kinda made me feel that way but not quite as much as I feel I need.

I think I'm ready for my life.